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Disoriented, I looked up."Sally, are you okay?" Ron asked, the hand that shook my shoulder still extended.My sleepy eyes focused, trying to send messages to my bewildered brain. I shook my head and blinked several times."Why were you sleeping on the couch? Is anything wrong?" I ... um ... I guess I fell asleep. What time is it?" It's 8:30. I came home to change but I gotta get back to the office. Are you okay? I'll stay if there's something wrong."Rubbing my eyes I said, "No, nothing's wrong. Do what you have to do."I trailed Ron upstairs but took a detour to Mike's room. Peeking in, I saw the messed up bed and his clothes on the floor where he left them. Then my eyes opened wide. I ran into the room and grabbed my robe, throwing it under Mike's bed. And then it hit me -- my son hadn't come home. Sulking, I went to my bedroom and plopped onto the bed, physically tired and emotionally drained. I watched in silence as my husband put on a fresh set of clothes, feeling a pang when he. The Japanese girls were mostly dressed in skimpy, shear teddies. They all wanted selfies with Santa. By the time I reached New Zealand, they wanted a little more from Santa than a present! It was the same all across Australia, the Philippines, the whole damn trip!”The now frightened elf had to ask, “What did they want Santa?”“ME,” Santa shouts. Pulling a small note pad from his suit pocket, “In all total, I got 3,504 blow jobs, I ate 6,214 pussies, I had anal sex 1,363 times!” Still fuming at the elf, “I lost count of the straight sex I performed and I didn't bother counting the rim-jobs, either given or received.”“But... but... That would be well over total number.”“You didn't back check all those requests little man!” Santa now screaming. “Do you know how many sets of twins I ran into? Do you have any idea how many girls wanted to go around-the-world with Santa? Not to mention the 27 all girl dormitories where you scheduled stops. Then the most surprising of all, was the eleven.
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